Be sure to listen today!

This one was a battle!

The audio on the intro was messed up, so I clipped it out to spare you… that being said, enjoy!

Brandon Handley 0:00
Let’s hop into it. Let’s hop into it. Part Two, the first part here talking about the chapter eight, you always act in your self interest. Everyone does, right. So the opening talks a little bit about how you essentially carry a lot of guilt and blame, you know, everywhere that you go out, and he talks, he lists a number of different ways that you do this. And, you know, a couple of different ways that you’ll do this would be, you know, kind of beating yourself up for bingeing a Netflix series that, you know, you shouldn’t have bins, or maybe, you know, you’ve gone off off of that diet that you’ve been working on, or maybe there was a was an important interview, that didn’t work out quite the way that it was. And then there’s another one. So you blame yourself for all those things. And then, then there’s the other piece of blame, right, where you blame your parents for kind of who you are and where you are today. And things like that, or your spouse’s significant others, and other people who may have ruined your lives, right? Children, relatives, co workers, it’s all their fault. They just talks about the idea that these are really terrible burdens to carry. And I love the idea that he talks about when you’re carrying those that you’re not free to pick up some of the better things in life and keep it short. You know, the good news is really, you can let go of these things. And we’re going to walk through a little bit of how that gets done. So we start off with the idea of laws of nature, and the idea that they are fixed, and immutable. Right. So gravity is an example of a law of nature. And the idea of it is that you really don’t blame gravity when something happens. And the story that he tells in this book is the idea that you’ve gone out and you’ve got this magnificent camera, you’re out there taking pictures, next thing, you know, you turn around, and you drop the camera, right? you’re you’re you’re you’re going to be upset first show what show you’re going to be like, man, maybe I should have gotten that. Maybe I should have gotten that insurance, I but the thing is, you’re not going to be pissed at our gravity for doing what is just done, right? Ideally, you’re gonna you’re gonna work to shape your life around gravity and kind of what happens in it. And, you know, so how does that look, you know, that looks like you’ve got a, you’ve got a strap right? around that super expensive camera, it’s around your neck. So you know, you do you at your house, your ceiling has a certain pitch, so that the water, the snow goes off in a certain direction, you know, at the park of a car, can we park in the car at the top of the hill, use the emergency brake, and you’ve got the parking brake, all these all these are examples of ways that you shape your life around this natural law of gravity, talks about the idea that there is another natural law. And that is the law of self interest. And once you learn a little bit about what this law of self interest is, you will cease blaming others and you will cease flaming your self, quite exciting to know that there’s a way to release these things that you’ve kind of been putting out there on everybody, including yourself. So what is the law of self interest, the law of self interest is, drumroll please, everybody, at all times, always acts in his or her perceived self interest. All right? Again, everybody, at all times, always acts in his or her perceived self interest. Now, you may disagree a little bit, you may list out all the different things that you do for everybody else. That the Justice though is if you look at it directly, you’re going to realize that what you do is because you you got like this schematic, you’ve got a blueprint, you’ve got the certain way that you believe that you need to be one of those ideas is being a parent and creating that lunch for your child in the morning. And you know, I’ve certainly done this, but you know, the the outside, you know, we see, well, you know, I’m doing it because I want to have a healthier lunch I want to I want X, Y and Z to happen. But the truth of the matter is, is that I’m doing it because I have this certain way that I feel like I am and in order for me to fit within this. This paradigm. Then I’ve got it I’ve got to do I’ve got to make this lunch and I’m doing it and really almost as much as my self interest is anything else.

You know, another place that another place that you’ll see this is, you know, maybe there’s a hard luck story going on maybe, maybe there’s a hurricane or there’s a relief fund. And hey, you know what you go when you donate to that, because it makes you feel good, makes you feel good to give. And it’s because it’s because you’ve got yourself and this certain category of the idea that you’re a compassionate person. And in order to act within that schema, within that certain degree, you’ve got to donate otherwise, I mean, you’re not that person that you feel like you are, right. So again, you are working within your own self interest, even if you are out there giving to others, right, you’re giving to others, because that’s what you feel complete who you are, that, you know, that makes you feel like you’re a good or better person. And, you know, it’s really not a secret that the idea of philanthropy is to cater to the egos of the wealthy, by demonstrating that they can make a difference. Right? Truthfully, you’re still acting in your own perceived self interest. And once you once you realize this, it can become, he says, a wonderful, and liberating, even if it doesn’t seem that way first, because at first, you’re still kind of you’re walking, you’re walking through your own. You’re kind of walking through your own minutiae, as it were, was that is that right? I don’t know, I don’t know if that’s exactly the right way to say it, is the idea. So if you act like this, if you’re acting like this, in your own best perceived self interest, and everybody’s doing it, you, you can kind of stop feeling guilty about it for yourself, and then you can also start to see it in the, in the, in the through through that lens, realize that, yes, that person may be doing it in their self interest, but everybody does. So you can kind of stop beating them up for it, right? Like, you know, blaming, you know, your parents for doing what they’ve done. And, again, a lot of times, as a parent, I can tell you, like, I don’t want my children to do X, Y, or Z. Because sometimes that’s almost a reflection on me. And, or B because, you know, I’m raising them to be a certain way. And, you know, if they, if they don’t, you know, kind of do that, then do I withhold something from them, right. And then so later in life, they’re gonna blame me for, you know, for example, my youngest son wants me to take take them to do like, axon is like, nine. I was like, well, maybe maybe not. Right, but, you know, come to a point later in life where he’s like, you know, I could have been an amazing actor or something, my father, but he’ll have to understand that I was just looking out for his, you know, kind of all the self interest, right? So in terms of when it when it comes time to blame your parents for anything, they’re really just out there doing even though it’s their best interests, are they looking out for you, too, anyways, you know, gets convoluted, I guess, if if you if you kind of walk it all out with the the the general ideas like everybody is acting in that same way, right. So if your parents were doing it, back, then it just let it go. You’re doing it now, I promise you, you got a little sloppy in there. But I hope you followed the gist. The idea really is, again, everybody’s doing it, you’re not the only one, don’t beat yourself up for yourself, if you do it, and don’t be somebody else up for doing it. Right? Just kind of understand that, you know, they’re they’re working it out

Unknown Speaker 8:47
in their own way.

Brandon Handley 8:49
So it talks about the exercise of kind of dropping the camera. And the idea is, you know, take a take a moment and think about three things you regret having done what should have and why didn’t eyes, think of how when you did them, you were acting your proceed best interests. And today, with greater maturity, you may see clearly what you did not then that that you thought was in your best interest, but really wasn’t just kind of goes to the idea of my Angelou line, you know, do do your best, do your best until you know better really is kind of what it boils down to. So we’ll pause here on chapter eight, you always act in your self interest everyone does. And I will come back to it and we’ll finish it up. We’ve got two more sections on it that I think are probably a couple of my favorite two. When I when I first saw them and even even when I first saw the residual continuous impact of them. By my fourth time of reading this book has been in itself a force multiplier. So we’re going to the universe is a force multiplier. And we’re also going to do a new take on networking. Come on back Chapter Eight. Get that right back on boy.

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