What does it look like to lose everything in search of your dream?
Many would say that you must let go of your old life in order to gain your new life.
Dave has a story which I have personally been following for 3 years now.
I have interviewed him here so share that you can indeed follow a life of purpose and find massive success… the path may seem darkened from time to time… but don’t give up… you get one shot… make it count!
Connect with Dave here:
Brandon Handley 0:03
Do you like that? Ah, yeah. Did you know about that? Hey guys, this is Brandon Handley I am on today with Dave. Gisela Dave is gonna be my very, very first guest and a podcast that hasn’t even been introduced or released anywhere yet. We’re calling it spiritual dope. I’ve kind of subtext lines. Let me know how that gets your hit, right get your hit, get your dose or get your hit. I’m still kind of up in the air with
Dave Gieselman 0:28
a hit. I like
calling it dope and you get treated. If we’re calling a medicine, you might want to bolus or a dose
Brandon Handley 0:38
not an analysis because like I’ve already I’ve got I’ve got artwork being done. I’m just all about this, this thing. So
Dave Gieselman 0:46
as a doe as an ex dope head, if it’s dope, I’m gonna get my head right so I’m gonna get my fix. Well,
Brandon Handley 0:54
yeah, now fixes a little too bright past the border. I’m gonna stick with get your hit right like I think that That’s my demographic. Those are my people. That’s who I’m talking to. I don’t think I can talk to the people that get their fix. Those are beyond my health, right? I mean, honestly, right? Like, I mean, I’m just gonna call it the way I see it. So yeah man and and the premise is like, you know, people you know, there’s going to be like the spiritual hit conversations like the, you know, my one on ones or my, my one offs were like, I’m just speaking from the dome sharing my you know, I won’t call it wisdom, but I’ll say, Share, share, whatever it is, is coming through me to you. Right. And then, and then have some conversations with some with some really awesome entrepreneurs. Or even like, you know, professionals who have, you know, figured out how to live spiritually in alignment with themselves and be successful in the world. And I think that Dave, you know, you you you fit that mold, right and you also fit you fit the eye, you know, this this kind of ideal piece where I don’t know, you know, what would you call it when you were? Let’s just tell us what you’re about where you’re from what you’re doing.
Dave Gieselman 2:09
Let’s see, let’s let’s start it. Let’s start easy. You know, my name is Dave giesemann. I am from, from Los Angeles, California still live here I am, I’m a unicorn, I’m actually from LA. And I am the coach and the founder of become limitless. It is it is my coaching organization. And I work with I work with mostly women, but I work with with men and women who who are looking to uplevel. Right, who, who want who want more and for the most part I work with I work with leaders, I work with professionals and work with CEOs who people who are have achieved achieved level of success and are ready to go to the next one and they’re running In the upper limit problems, they’re running into, I, I, I don’t know how to take the next step for myself, I don’t know what it looks like, and, and I don’t know, if I have the capacity for it, I know I’m being pulled in that direction. But I got some stuff that I need to get sorted out in order to get there. And, and so this is where because our in our businesses light, right, our shit always shows up in our business, you know, your, your business is a is a is a very, very clear indicator of your life. The problems in your business are a very clear indicator of the problems that are probably in your personal life. Because it’s all it’s all it all shows up in the same way.
Brandon Handley 3:49
Look, I mean, there’s there’s no separation between business and your life, right? I mean, they’re both your life. I mean, right? You can’t I mean, you really can’t separate it and, you know, as we’re, you know today Today, we’re going to be talking about Spiritual stuff or as I like, you know, that’s what you call life. I mean, if you took away the life that’s within within you, you you drop to the ground right like I mean, I got no other name yet so whatever you know you could call it Jimmy right whatever whatever’s whatever’s got your whatever’s got your boat humming but whatever is inside of you it’s gonna show up outside of you one way or another right? So if you don’t have your shit together, if you’re a hot mess at home, you’re a hot mess at work, right? You’re a hot mess and even if you don’t look like it, you are
Dave Gieselman 4:35
right. If If, if you lack communication skills in your home, if you lack the ability to empathize if you lack the ability to connect with with your family, with your with the people around you, that is going to seep into your business and you will lack the ability to to connect with clients, colleagues, employees You’re potentially your employer. And yeah, whatever is on the inside is, is inevitably going to show up on the outside. Yeah,
Brandon Handley 5:09
yeah. So your story, I think is one that, you know, I can’t share enough of right because I just love the journey. I love kind of where you’ve come from where you and I were talking a little bit about this before we’ve known each other for about three years now, three years ago, right? I still remember catching God driving down the highway, you’re given a motivation talk. And just, you know, it was talking to me like almost directly, right. And then a little bit later you you you gave a talk just talking about like the the dog whistle, right? Like there’s certain people they’re going to hear your message because they’re at that point, right. And then, you know, you also talk quite a bit about like, you know, the universe unfolding just kind of like the next step that you’re asking for, like whatever it is that you’re asking for. Yes, right. Universe is gonna stamp approved, right? If, and and it’s true if that’s how you decide to live, right? And I think that that’s, you know, when people talk about the power of choice, that’s where it gets to. Right. It’s a choice. It’s a life choice to live that way. Right. So, let’s talk. I mean, I don’t know the pre Dave’s story so well, so what? What led you to start believing in that? Right? What led you into that?
Dave Gieselman 6:31
You know, the just because I want to talk about what what’s current and relevant but just to give you guys the Cliff’s notes on it. Yeah, like I said, I grew up here in Los Angeles. And while all the other little boys and girls on the playground, were developing healthy, healthy coping mechanisms, I was developing numbing mechanisms. And it went from it went from food, to caffeine to cigarettes to masturbation to sex to, to, to, to alcohol to drugs. By by 22 years old, I was completely homeless drug addict and alcoholic on the streets of of, of LA I was in Pasadena and and at 24 I got sober 24 years old I got I got sober and and my journey kind of began there I was, I was I was homeless, I was a mess, I was completely feral. And, and kind of had this starting from scratch place where, you know, like, I had no clue who I was. And, you know, I had no clue about anything. And what I basically had was the opportunity if I could build it anyway, I wanted to build it. How did I want to build it? How did I want to build this man? How did I want to build who I was how did I want to build a life And so I just I began making conscious very conscious decisions about how I wanted to treat myself how I wanted to treat others, how I wanted to engage with with the world around me and, and I made some, in those first few years I made some very, very strong decisions, I made some decisions about, you know, the way that I would I would interact with with my fellow men like never again, would I engage in that sort of bullshit like chop fight or or you know, you know, you know, they call you know, cutting, you know, in in in some areas, you know that that running verbal battle between men where we sit there and tear each other down, for fun and for sport. And I decided that I was never I was never going to participate in that again, like, like my brothers have a have enough. We have enough coming at us. Just just in this room like I don’t need to tear my brothers down. I will build my brother every single time. Guaranteed, I don’t care what the world thinks to me, I’m the very first person that I’m gonna I’m gonna tell one of my brothers that he’s, he’s handsome, He’s good looking. He’s, you know, he’s, he’s smart, he’s articulate and has something to offer the world. I’m going to be the first person to tell one of my brothers that, that, that he has absolutely everything he needs inside of him to be an amazing husband and amazing father, an amazing employer, a good moneymaker. If If those are the things that he decides to incorporate in his day to day behaviors, rather than the fearful, selfish, self centered son of a bitch, then we all kind of are on the inside. You know?
Brandon Handley 9:50
Yeah, look, man, I think we all had the propensity for that. And I think that that’s really I think that’s the environment that most Most of us end up growing up and right, like we’ve got to get what’s ours, we’ve got to make sure that if somebody’s better than us, we need to make or you know, if somebody is showing talent or skill or in some way, superior to you got to cut them down, bring them down to size, you’re not being humble. Where’s your pride? You know, you’re way too prideful. Right, and that and that type of thing. So, you know, was it right after, you know, you kind of you sober up that that’s when you make that decision that you decided that that was where you’re going to be or, you know, did you kind of, was it it? Was it a pass into that
Dave Gieselman 10:40
the path into that was, you know, first off I you know, like, like I said, I was I was homeless when I when I first started, and about a year and some change into my, you know, into sobriety, you know, I met I met a girl, and you know, she thought I was cute and I was not in a position to argue with her. And, and so, my, my first experience there was, you know, this this person really liked me and, and, and I wouldn’t what I what what I, I wanted was I didn’t want her to find out that I was just feral as I was, but, you know, and, and so I began making decisions lately What? What is the guy that she deserves act like? What is the guy that she deserves? What does that guy behave like how does he show up in the world? How does he know how does he act? What does he do? How does he act around the house? And, and you know, and she bought it you know and and and I did, I did the actual I behaved right in a way that that I wanted to be like I and like I like I coach now, you know, if you want to be something else, you got to behave in a different way. And you know, it’s just like making your bed in the morning, right? Somebody told me You know, early on, make your bed every day and I’m gonna go we’re gonna have to do a sobriety because nothing, just do what I told you to do. And so I consciously made my bed every day. And at some points, I stopped consciously making my bed every day and I shifted, I transformed into a guy who just made his bed every day without without thinking about and I would no more, you know, leave the house, I’m making my bed and I’d leave the house, brushing my teeth, or anything else for sure. Right. Right. And, and so I began behaving in the way and the way we the way we behave in the way we speak, will alter our brains, right? And so I began thinking like the guy, like a guy who acted the way I was acting. And I began using language in the manner of the guy that I wanted to be. And so I literally started acting like the man I wanted to become, and I don’t know when it happened, but at some point I transformed into the man that I wanted to be Rather than acting like the man I wanted to be.
Brandon Handley 13:03
Now I love the 100% because your audio is got a match the video, right? And it doesn’t even happen on purpose. It doesn’t happen on purpose because you’re acting in such a manner for so long. Right? That it just that’s who you become. Right you right? You, you, you spoke it into existence, as they say,
Dave Gieselman 13:26
right, right. Right. You, you you act it into existence, you speak it into existence, you know, like, Look, whether you are whether you’re doing it consciously, but if you are, if you are acting, if you are in all of the behaviors of a guy who takes care of his body, who goes to work every day, who shows up on time, who pays his bills, if you are in all of those behaviors are you not are you not that person, right? And whether you whether you need to remind yourself to be in those behaviors or not. You know, at some point, it just becomes, it becomes your habit, your routine, your subconscious, that that’s running that program. But regardless of whether, you know, you’re, you know, deep down, you’re, you’re this just just frightened, selfish, self centered, you know, piece of work. But what I want to do is is, is I want to be something greater than that, right, your, your behaviors will always dictate, you know who you are. And so, when you become this thing when you begin acting this way, it’s, you know, it becomes a yard and so and so we can, you can literally act your way into into a better life a better, a better, you know, a better life better health better, whatever, like, because, because you’re actually taking the actions of the person who does those things.
Brandon Handley 14:59
No I totally agree, man. And And the funny thing is, is I think that a lot of us we’ve been told that before, right, that’s not new, you’ve gotta you’ve got to be before you can do before you know you can have or something like that, right? I forget that I forget the line hundred percent. Okay, so, you know you’re going through that journey, you get married, you’re a chef,
Dave Gieselman 15:20
get married, had a kid, right? I got married, had a kid and it was the same way. Right? Like, what is the best father that I can be? What does that guy behave like? What is what are the actions of that man? Right? And I’m just gonna be in those actions. Yeah, yeah, at the time. I’m a chef. I’m working in an eye on hotels and restaurants in Los Angeles. And, you know, and I’m working with a lot of drug addicts and alcoholics because, you know, of I was just I was giving back what was so freely given to me. It was things I was sponsoring, I was in 12 step 12 step recovery and, and that’s kind of the deal with 12 step. Recovery is like the minute you get back on your feet, your feet back underneath you, not when you get your shit back in your life back, you start making money again, and you’re kind of established and have some free time. Now, the second you have your feet back under you, you turn around and you reach back into the hole and you start pulling other people out like that. That is the deal. And that was that is what was impressed upon me is that the only way that I’m ever going to get better is to help other people get better. And, and that was a such a fundamental piece and continues to be such a fundamental piece of who I am now and working as a working as a chef. Like I always wanted the people around me to get better. I always wanted to them and so I got into mentor I got into a lot of personal development. I got into a lot of mentoring. I got into a lot of stuff. And what I found was that I actually enjoyed helping people develop into better versions of themselves. I actually enjoyed that more than I enjoyed, you know the kitchen life. For sure, and in. And so I’ve been and so I’ve been coaching now for coaching for about 17 years in one capacity or another. And in 2017, I retired from professional kitchens. I opened my I opened my coaching business as a business about a year before. And in 2017. I retired from professional kitchens to coach speaking right full time.
Brandon Handley 17:29
I love that, you know, wasn’t just sitting there, I was like, you know, we want people to be better versions of themselves not I don’t wonder if, you know, it’s the same thing. It’s the same thing just said differently. It’s like, help them uncover who they truly are right like that. You know, your, your best version of you has been, you know, put in jail. Right. Your best version of you has been locked up, right. Your best version of you has been Um, Miss fucking lead.
Dave Gieselman 18:04
Yeah, and the and the best version of me is informed by all of these things is informed by a violent that is informed by finding yourself on the on the wrong end of a firearm or a, you know cops billy club or you know, like, like any number of things, you know the the best version of me is in the best version of me is also informed by but teaching my son how to ride a bike and and learning what we’re learning what like what true like, like patience and, and persistence like from persistence, consistency and patience looked like and which I didn’t know until you know until my son was sick and and you know we can’t shake a toddler for not feeling well nurtured them you know he and and just the same way You know you, you can’t, you cannot be raped another man into being a better version of himself, you nurture them, you know, and the best version of you is always inside you. And that’s why I say the best version of you because who you are the very best version of you the very very best know that if you want to if you want to get spiritual with it, the The, the, you know, everything that God ever wanted you to be without all the dumb cheap, lame, bullshit aftermarket shit that you stuck on with like duct tape and
bio, you bought right
about the big dumb spoiler on the back of the Corolla?
Brandon Handley 19:43
Right? You got three badass rims?
Dave Gieselman 19:46
Yeah, you know, and, you know, like it was it’s all bunch of cheap, dumb bullshit aftermarket stuff. And the best version of you doesn’t need any of that, you know, like, and so we asked the question, right. If you woke Tomorrow as at 100% of God’s potential for you, what would that guy be like
Brandon Handley 20:07
talking on real, right? It’s unreal. Because I’ll tell you, I’m reading. I’m reading way too much. I’m filling my head way too much stuff. And I love it all though like I am. There’s actually a person called spiritual junkie, I’ll have to talk to her.
it’s, it’s unfathomable. Right, your potential, right. It’s on fathomable limitless is indeed it so I want to go to that place where you found that for yourself and talk about that for me
Dave Gieselman 20:43
you know it a lot of it came from you know, it came from my journey with with with my own with my own body right so you know, in in sobriety, I first of all, I got I got sober I got off the streets. I never thought I could Do that, you know, then I found I found love and I never thought I could do that. Right. Then then along comes my son. I never thought I could do that. And, and, you know, I never thought that I could I could like show up and be responsible, you know, a responsible human being for age someone just want to be with me be someone want to make a baby with me, you know and and
Brandon Handley 21:24
the BMA like maybe nobody wanted to, but then they did and then they decided you could stick around and still be the dad.
Dave Gieselman 21:30
Right? You know, like, like, yeah, that was like best case scenario. Right? And, you know, and so and so all of these things, I kind of came to this place where you know, I I began to question every single limitation I believe I had, you know, and and my son was about four and we got it we can I got into Brazilian Jiu Jitsu together. And I you know, and through this process through this art, you know, I’ve been voted for for 12 years I you know, I, I start training I watch my body change, I watch my belief in myself change I watch my son grow up without any fear of other human beings. I watch I watch it transformed him into into the young man that I need them to be today. I started competing and finding out that I had strength and capability beyond whatever I thought, what what else I thought was possible. I got into Spartan races and tough motors and began going okay, so if, if I can do this, what else can I do? Right? And I’m going to start I’m gonna start beating up the body as hard as I can. And just finding finding limits and and I I didn’t find any I and so and so then I start opening up to the is there is there something more for me? Is there something greater for me and that’s where become limitless came from is is I at one point I ceased to believe not only in my limitations, but in the limitations of others. Like I just I simply stopped believing in them. And you know, and I was leading a group of women last night, and I told me the exact same thing I go, I don’t believe in your limitations, I don’t believe in them. And I am going to stretch you beyond everything that you believe you’re capable of. Because if there’s one thing that human beings have shown, is that they are piss poor at understanding their own limitations. Right? Every time we think we understand the limits of human potential, somebody else throws a rocket, you know, into the, into, into outside the solar system. You know, we thought we could never fly until we flew. We thought we could never. We thought we could never, you know, go into space until we went into space without we could never explore other planets until we explored other planets. You No, we thought we could never live underwater until we lived underwater. And every single time. We think we have a limitation. There’s always some dude just like me or just like you send the back one.
You want bet?
Brandon Handley 24:14
For sure. For sure. I mean, I’ll throw this out at you. I mean, do they say that, like, 85% of our DNA is junk DNA? And I got to ask myself the question, you know, to, you know, the god universe, anybody give me something that I can’t use? Right, right. I ain’t got no junk DNA. I just don’t know how to use that other 85%. Right. Yeah, right. Right. Like, I haven’t had that yet. And it’s like, what, what’s it gonna take for me? To figure out how to turn that on. What’s it gonna take for me, you know, to make the decision of Yeah, I can do that. I just got to go try it.
Dave Gieselman 24:49
Right. Right. And so when I decided to do this, I leapt into it. I leaped into a brand new career I’d spent 30 years in professional kitchens, I leaped into a brand new career you know and I made the leap and and you know just like the matrix nobody nobody makes me
Brandon Handley 25:09
well listen I mean here’s the other part right like I’m reading I just finished this book called The path of the initiator initiates path one of the two right? And you know, one of the one of the things in in that and you read it in like almost all the other religions are like all the other like you know coming of age enlightenment things is like
Unknown Speaker 25:30
you have to get rid of everything
Brandon Handley 25:35
that you had in order to become who you are right in order to accept this new path for yourself in order to you know, you you went all the way in for it and you the price that you paid, was was giving up everything to become who you are today, right? The semi fair like I mean look
nearly every you your whole life. Since you and I have met
Dave Gieselman 26:03
radically different, oh,
yeah, no. So when I
Brandon Handley 26:06
said sorry, and that’s just in three years,
Dave Gieselman 26:08
right when I when I leapt into that new career late cost my marriage, you know, it cost me every dime I had it cost my retirement. It literally cost you know everything and I ended up you know, getting divorced liquidating my retirement, you know, you know, doing doing 1000 other things. And you know, they say that, you know, your new life is waiting for you. It is going to cost your old life though. You know, and that is true. And but, you know, for everybody who’s like, you know, right now just kind of sweating bullets, right. Let me save it. There is absolutely nothing. I have had to let go of that I lament losing there is absolutely nothing. That my life right now cost me Do I regret letting go of
Brandon Handley 27:03
it? That was all I mean, look, I mean, I was thinking about it like if you know if you’re kind of run like I think of anime for some reason, I think like, you know, you know somebody is always running there’s like 100 hooks coming at you right those hooks that are hooking on to you, that’s all the shit that you just can’t let go of, right? That’s all the shit that’s keeping you from moving forward. Maybe not, you know, maybe not 100% keeping you from moving forward but each one of those hooks that gets released from you allows you to move that much freer.
Dave Gieselman 27:31
Right, you know, and I’d like to give everybody who’s listening to this permission right now. The your life The your life today does not need to look anything like your life three years from now, or that your life today doesn’t need to look anything like your life a year from now. Look, you are welcome to change anything at any moment. And, and completely reinvent yourself. Yes, right. And so You know, the what happens is a lot of people in it, and here’s the limitation, right? Well, what if I, what if I do this and it’s the wrong decision? What if I do this and it’s the wrong move? And the question I asked every single person is how will you know? I will you know, if it’s the wrong decision, I made the decision. It literally cost my marriage and every Sunday and every cent to my name. And and now less than, less than three years later, right, less than three years later, I’m living in a beautiful house with with an amazing woman who is absolutely the love of my life. Who who had you know, I you know, I got my, my, my, my, my little blue house with a white picket fence, you know, in, in, you know, here in northeast Los Angeles, with a woman who, who, who I love more and more every single day. My life is exciting. Ordinary and I will tell you that it cost every single bit of my old life. The one thing it did not cost me was my relationship with my son right now as the one thing that it did not cost me. And as a matter of fact, my son respects me now more than he did then, because he saw that it was time for that for that situation. And he understood it. And what he saw was his father make a conscious decision to do something he wanted to do. It he saw what it costs. He saw the way I suffered for what I believed, and now he has seen me build a life that is that is incredible.
Brandon Handley 29:48
Yeah, no, it’s it’s super powerful. That’s why I love the story, man. That’s why I super love the story. And, and let’s keep talking about the types of things that like That the universe provides right like, because here’s, here’s one of the things that happened to me recently was, uh, you know, I was always kind of worried about the job that I had, right one of the jobs I have because I got paid really well. And I was spending all my money because that’s what I do as an American, I just spend all my money and then some So, so, you know, got to the point and then and then I was down in Louisiana. And, you know, this, you know, Puerto Rican guy picked me up from an Uber ride and we got to chat and he’s like, yeah, make like $2,000 a week driving Uber. I was like, so my worst case scenario is I drive Uber Okay, I’m good. So whatever happens happens like i think you know, Tim Ferriss calls it fear setting now I’m not gonna sit there and focus on the biggest worst possible thing that could ever happen my life because needs to spend their time thinking about that. But I mean, yeah, you did. You you you ended up you living at home, time to list and I’m sure there are some people that were like what the fuck do you think you’re doing days?
Dave Gieselman 31:06
Oh, I’ll tell you right now, there’s still people. There are still people who’ve known me for years and years and years who believe that I’m experiencing maintenance experiencing a midlife crisis. There are still people, like, members of my own family are still a little bit curious about what I’m going to go back to my job and my wife, like, like they they are still curious. And I’m like, I, I made. I made more in the first quarter of this year than in my best year of any kitchen ever. You know, if I made more in the first quarter of this year than I made in a year, in any kitchen I’ve ever been in. My life is richer and fuller than it has ever been in my life. Ever. My life, my life is better. And you know, there will always be the BBC when we Worry, right? What what we’re doing is we are we are literally putting energy into, we are imagining scenarios that we don’t want. Right? That’s what we do when we worry. And one of the things that I had to do, and I would encourage anybody who’s listening to do this was looking at at taking a lever or making a shift, like I had to, I had to change my relationship with failure. Like, you know, what, what would failure look like for me? You know, and for me, right for me,
you know, failure like
going back to kitchens, literally, you know, you talk about your goes bad. I started driving, I start driving Uber and yeah, and I drove lift for a minute. All right. What what was new kitchens. So true abject catastrophic failure for me looks like a six figure job. Right? Like, for sure going, you know, right, going, going back to hotels and, and high end restaurants. That’s what but
Brandon Handley 33:21
so that’s a scenario though, right? Where you’re working for money versus working for something that you believe in, right? Am I right or wrong in that?
Dave Gieselman 33:30
Absolutely. You know, yeah, I was working for money and I was making and I was making decent money, and I hated it. I was hiding behind what at what will I do? Will my family do without the money? Right? And the truth is, is that the money, the money went anyway, it didn’t matter. I made it because I made it work.
Brandon Handley 33:49
Sure. Well, you know, I think that there’s a so I mean, I don’t know you listen, I’m not trying to get too far out there. But like, you know, the same source is taken care of Mi is taking care of everybody else.
Dave Gieselman 34:02
And when we connect with it and whether you call that God Allah Buddha, Yoda, the the universe spirits source, Mitch like what what, like whatever it is you call that is irrelevant. Right the fact the matter is is that that there is a there is a universal intelligence to to energy. Right, you know, and energy has an intelligence of its own. And it’s an intelligence and energy has an intelligence that can be harnessed it can be, it can be directed. And, you know, and it’s and it’s funny because, you know, people, people struggle with believing it until they have to until they have to. And once they and once they’re there, they’re in a position where they have to use them. They’re like, Oh, that’s how it works.
Brandon Handley 34:54
Well, we were talking a little bit about this in the beginning here, right. It’s the choice to believe in it. Right once you once first of all once once you have that conversation with somebody it rattles around in your brain for a long time. Like he breathed this motherfucker said he said universe Mitch he said Mitch had my back and you know what I encourage people to do is look for evidence of it right don’t you don’t need hey don’t don’t start big you know you don’t have to make that leap you don’t have to make that leap so much that you’re gonna fall and hit your face and you know potentially die take a couple of years was crawl walk around man you know crawl walk run
Dave Gieselman 35:39
right well, the first the first step to achieving an impossible goal is to set one sure right. Yeah. You know, set an impossible goal and and stretch or stretch yourself this much Mike. Like my my introduction to Brazilian Jiu Jitsu. Was was this look, I took myself Son this little community Jiu Jitsu program because he was foreign it’s time to like get in doing something on on a Saturday morning and and whether it was you know chasing with chasing a soccer ball with a bunch of other four year olds or or throwing you know throwing a baseball or or figuring out how to how to how to catch or whatever run now we checked out this this this Jiu Jitsu program and because a buddy of mine was in it and and he recommended it and and so I’m like watching the kids out on the mat do their thing. And, and one of the parents came up to me and said, so you’re gonna do adult classes right after this. You can do the adult class. And I looked at this one I’m like, like, I’m a 265 pound chain smoking chef. No, no, I’m not. I’m not taking the adult class, right? I’m not I’m not doing that. And she’s like, that’s cool. So when you’re saying Son, you know, is a 15 year old black belt and, and you think he should clean his room and he thinks you should go piss up a rope? Like, what exactly do you intend to do about that? I’m like, Okay, well, maybe one class, you know, for sure, you know, you know, and maybe maybe I’ll just take one, you know, and I and I took this class and i and i and i did this thing, and I got on the mat, and these guys tied me into 100 million knots. Like it was. It was a completely hopeless situation I couldn’t when I had a little hundred 50 pound girl who could throw me off her and choke me unconscious at will, right like and there was nothing I could do to, to like to like stop that from happening. And, you know, at the end of the class, I was I was breathing heavy. I wanted to throw up, I wanted to die. I’d been humiliated about 150 times, you know, in the last 30 minutes. And, and, you know, three or four of the guys in the class came up to me. And like, by the way, that’s what everybody’s first day looks like, right? I’m back. Right I you know did did you enjoy it and I and I did. I like being physical I like, you know that that that thing I enjoy that and they’re like that’s what everybody’s for. It’s what your first aid you do.
Brandon Handley 38:24
Thank you for that. Yeah Dave, you’re the one who got me into that and, man, it’s not happening right now. And, you know, we talked about like, you know, that is part of my spiritual practice, right that that’s like those are like kind of my moments of flow. When I go in. I’m participate in jujitsu, but you’re dead, right, man. I think I broke my rib. On my very first day, couldn’t sleep for a month and my girl is 115 pounds. She’s purple belt and just like, what made it even worse was she was the girlfriend of the badass jujitsu instructor. And she’s like, you know, he’s like, all right. Go Russell, my girlfriend’s like, What the fuck is this? weird girl brother? Yeah, right, right. It was weird. That made it weird, but like, you know, she kicked my ass for like the next six months. And it wasn’t until like, she didn’t put me into you know, she didn’t. She didn’t choke me. Like, in one round that I felt like I’d accomplished something. But, you know, to your point, like I mean, we go in there and we start at the bottom and we stretch ourselves just a little bit more every day right and i think that kind of that’s the takeaway for anybody who who maybe they don’t believe that they can accomplish this big dream you you you as a coach, what do you what do you help them do with these big dreams?
Dave Gieselman 39:42
You know what look I
start saying yes shit. It doesn’t matter what it is start saying yes to shit your you know, your your super and
Brandon Handley 39:54
I don’t even know what to do. I don’t even know how to say no, I’m terrible.
Dave Gieselman 39:58
Right? But just start seeing Is your super athletic homeboy? He goes hey do you want to you know do you want to go you’ll run a thing with me and instead of going like no that sounds horrible just say things sure you know your your you know your girlfriend who wants to to introduce you to some you know type of music like see yet just are saying yes but they say yes to stuff and I understand that there are people who say yes to too much right and and so they get overwhelmed because they’re people pleasers or whatever I’m not talking about people pleasing right i mean stretch beyond your
Brandon Handley 40:38
say say yes to new say yes to new experience, say
Dave Gieselman 40:42
yes to new experiences, and like and say yes to new experiences like the same new experience, like three times before you make a decision on it. Oh, yeah. Like just start saying yes to stuff right you know, and and and, you know, This is gonna bring up a whole conversation about, about boundaries and whatever. And that’s not what I’m talking about. Sure, you know, you know that’s not that’s not
Brandon Handley 41:09
to say say yes to stretching yourself in in a meaningful kind of intentional what else is out there for me in my life kind of way that’s that’s right what you’re saying
Dave Gieselman 41:18
what would happen if you know what’s the worst that could happen if I if I if I said yes to this thing that sounds like inconvenient and I don’t want to and will
Brandon Handley 41:28
take me you said just to get up on stage we’ll call C’s right like I mean, that was a big thing for you. Wasn’t it like being up on stage with him?
Dave Gieselman 41:35
Yeah, I see that. See, that wasn’t the plan. I you know, I you know, he asked for he asked for like input on something. And I didn’t know he was going to put me on stage. But what I but what I did was like not, not go run in front of him like Okay, so, so we’re going to do this and so that’s, that’s kind of the big thing is go like move in the door. directions the energy in your life is moving. Sure. I’m gonna do this. Okay, so here, here we go, you know, he asked, he asked who like, like who, you know, we did an exercise because all right, who just had a profound experience? Like I did he goes, we watch come tell me about it. So I started shouting and he’s like, no, no come up, come up on stage. So now I’m on stage with Kyle sees in front of 1500 people 16 1600 people, and and I get to have, you know, I get to a get introduced to the world as a coach on fallacies of stage and have a profound experience about myself, where I realized that I could literally write my own. write my own story. And it was funny because if you go if we go back to that, to that thing, and it’s, you know, it’s been all over the internet and wherever we go back to that moment, like at literally everything that I was afraid of happening when I made my leap happened. Sure. I literally every thing that I described as, as the thing that I was afraid of like actually happened. And when all those things happened, and I and I actually called Kyle I, I, you know, I had his cell phone number at somebody and I’m and I literally called him and I’m like, I’m like, Okay, so here’s I need to tell you this. So literally everything that I told you I was afraid of actually happened. Right everything I was afraid of happening happened. I did. I did what I said I was gonna do everything I was said I was afraid of happened. And so I am now literally standing at the bottom of the pit of my own worst nightmares having come true, the thing that the things that I was absolutely afraid of most, they are all alive and well in my life in this moment, right. And I have never felt so purposeful, so alive, so energized and so absolutely certain that I was doing the right thing for sure. Right. And so the All of the metrics that I had given myself for what catastrophic fail would look like, like yeah, I mean, I literally ticked every single box, right, of what catastrophic failure would look like. I gathered all of those things into my life at the exact same moment. And when this is the best I’ve ever felt, I’ve never felt more useful, more energized, and are more connected with the why, with with the reason I’ve been placed on this planet than I do right now. Yeah. And, once again, my idea of my own limitations. You know, my, my concept of what, what failure would look like what my own limitations were, once again, just like the rest of humans, like like, complete, like garbage, like complete nonsence my idea of what my limitations were, was absolutely laughable.
Brandon Handley 45:06
We look I mean, that that’s, that’s the very thing, right? We put ourselves in the tiniest box, right we put ourselves into the tie is like we think that we think that like our boundaries are so far out there and when we hit and we’re like, that was exhausting. But that’s like really this tiny little box right? I mean, be gone to explore the entire fucking universe, right? Like, I mean, it’s, it’s, it is limitless, there are no limits. Let’s talk just talk to me a little bit about though. Again, I want to I want to just you’re you’re serving, right, you’re doing this in service of others. And to me, I think that that is kind of the ultimate driver of like, you know, spiritual, you know, you’re driven spiritually so that you serve others like that. That which is inside of you, keeps coming through more and more powerfully, because you were giving it to others, you have to be that that fully charged.
Dave Gieselman 46:11
Absolutely. And, you know, and I am I am what I described as I’m a prime, I am a prime nurturer. Right. And, and I did it with food for a long time. Like I fed people like that’s what it was, what it was what fed me was, was feeding people making food. So, like, at the, at the bottom, like the base level food is is nurture. Right? The first thing your mother does is feed you like that’s like the, you know, the first thing that that that you know, the way that you identify, you know, the people in your families is because they feed you you know, when So, you know and, and, and so, and I am a I am a prime nurturer. My first instinct is to nurture and And is absolutely the reason that I am here is absolutely and, and what I, what I discovered was I found a way that felt more that felt even more authentic and and was actually more efficient than food. And it’s literally by crawling into somebody’s psyche with them. And, and like, and like, you know, so they’re showing me around they go Yeah, this is this is what I built and this is what I believe and and here are my limitations and I’m like, wait, and I tear it down like a backdrop. I’m like, yeah, it’s bullshit, right? Yeah. It’s that bullshit. Story. That’s the story story. That’s the narrative, right? That’s, that’s the thing that you have told yourself so that you can give yourself permission to stay small. Right?
Brandon Handley 47:52
Well, and you know, that’s, that’s the whole point of, you know, getting a coach as a coach. You as a coach. You don’t give a shit about their backstory.
Dave Gieselman 48:00
Okay, not only not only do I not give a shit about your backstory, right Wait,
Brandon Handley 48:05
you’re not gonna get permission like I love the line that too like you’re not there to give somebody you know, you’re like you’re not there to argue for their limitations. No,
Dave Gieselman 48:16
no, no no. Like Not only do I not care about your backstory, I don’t care about your fears like I don’t care about your i don’t i don’t care about the the the the narrative that you’ve told I don’t care about the meaning that you have placed on you know this that the other, I am here. expressively to I’m going to find out what it is that you want. Right You tell me what you want, which by the way is going to come from the deepest place in you what I wanted this right what I what I want is to serve the world at a at a very high level. What I want is to create a company that enables people to teach children everywhere what I you know, what I wanted to, you know, is you know, Whatever it is, whatever it is, your thing is, and by the way i don’t i don’t work with low level people. I don’t you know, I don’t work with people whose whose like, like, like deep and personal dream is to own a Wendy’s. Like, that’s not you know what’s wrong with that? Um, I get what you’re saying is it’s just not what work was it
Brandon Handley 49:18
was it’s not it’s, you know, we’ll talk about it’s not who you are it’s not who you are so that’s not who you attract to you right? Like you can law of attraction you can call whatever you want that’s just how the shit works. Right, right. Like I mean, you have knobs and whatever and, you know, you twist and turn and you tune into like, you know who you are people are attracted to who you are, you know, today, and, you know, most of the times the people that you’re helping is people that have been where you were at one point
Dave Gieselman 49:54
well, there are people who literally have all of my shit and and you know, this you, you know, you spend some time and Personal Development and you know, you, you work with people and the truth is, is that absolutely every single one of my clients, like has a has a deficiency of mine and me working with them is really me healing myself and and and that’s that’s the bottom line I love that too, you know, like I you know I’m not some I’m not a you know some guru I don’t I don’t have any sort of special wisdom what I what I have is the our absolute willingness to be like vulnerable and in breakdown at the public level like I am absolutely willing to to learn with you as as we grow right you know, and and you know, Lisa Sasa has called it lift as you climb, right? So as I’m climbing, on lifting, you know, and and so I am absolutely willing to To learn as I, as I, you know, as I grow and continue to believe that the people are placed in my life to teach me something for sure.
Brandon Handley 51:11
Every man is a lesson, every person’s lesson. I got asked this, this comes kind of from Joseph Campbell, you know, hero’s journey. Right? You know, there there was that point where you made that decision to become a coach like full time, right? That was a call. Right. That was that was a call and there was a little bit of hesitancy, I’m guessing, to heed that call, right. Oh, yeah. Yeah. So, you know, if you didn’t heed that call, like, if you don’t, I would, I would call that the heroes call. Right and and if you don’t accept that, what happens if you if you disregard that heroes Call
Dave Gieselman 52:02
what happens is if you get it you get called again. And and you get called again and the and here’s the problem as you get called again and again, the universal use more and more persuasive language every single time, which means saying no disregarding it, pushing it aside, will get more painful every time you do it.
Brandon Handley 52:31
Amen. So, and and I liken it to I liken it to, you know, you’re gonna grow whether or not you want to right and i think about it like as a seashell right like I mean you’re you know, you’re you’re the seed inside this shell and like you’re gonna pierce through like you got it that little that little sprout that like I could go by, you know, has enough energy and life force within it to crack a hard shell. I mean, that’s what’s happening. I think humans are you know, you’re There’s a seat right and you’re unfurling and there’s no you can resist as much as you want.
Dave Gieselman 53:08
Right? Well, here’s the here’s the fact of it that absolutely every single organism on earth understands its purpose and and knows that it is supposed to fully grow and fully expressed before and before passing on, you know, and to use your example you know, like, like, all the information for that for the, you know, hundred foot oak tree in that acorn, you know, and the acorn hits the ground and the moment that acorn hits the ground, it knows what it’s supposed to do, okay. It knows the roots go down, trunk goes up, branches go out, leaves are green, it knows this. And it has all the energy all the information all and all the the will it needs to do the tree and it knows that it’s supposed to fully tree right and Everything, everything fully expresses flowers fully, fully open, you know, you know, plants, you know, they fully express, you know, dogs fully that never in the history of dogs has a dog ever half assed being a dog dogs fully dog, right? Like humans are the only organisms on earth that doubt or debate whether they are supposed to fully express what is inside them before they pass on. Right some of them Yeah, but know who you know what why am I that special? Why is the OIC that special that it gets to take up that much space, right why you are take up your take your space, take your space in the universe, take your space, you know, there’s plenty of room
Brandon Handley 55:01
And you got to think about like this too, like there’s never any more or less mass in the universe. So there’s also that I’m just saying I’m putting out there right? Like, what you decide to do. Yes is going to have an impact but it’s not going to have a don’t limit yourself there’s you’re not gonna you’re not gonna you’re not gonna damage I think the world because you decided to believe in yourself.
Dave Gieselman 55:25
Right? Right. And that’s and that’s, that’s the whole thing is is that that thing that’s inside you that thing that won’t shut up the thing that won’t let you sleep? Think like that is your purpose. Like, make no mistake, that thing was put there by something because you are supposed to follow it. So like just again,
Brandon Handley 55:47
right? Like I mean, like all right, so so is like, well, that’s fucking great day. But what’s my purpose? Right? Well, go start to explore it right? What’s your answer? What’s your answer? Like? I mean,
Dave Gieselman 55:59
what are your passion? It’s okay your interests are a breadcrumb trail to your passions. your passions are a breadcrumb trail to your purpose. Right What? What do you fucking love? Like what do you love I’m not telling you right now. I love serving humans. You’ve known me long enough that you know this to be true. The thing that will get me out of bed every single day is Hey, you want to go be a service to somebody you want to you want to you want to go shift somebody’s life. You want to shift somebody’s perspective. You want to you want to go stand next to somebody well, while they watch their you know, while they watch, you know, a parent die, you know, do you want to do you want to go like, be somewhere you want to stand up? Do you want to go show up for another human? Yes, yes, I absolutely do every day, every day, my life in my dream in every way I can. Yes. What I want to do is to show up for other human beings.
Brandon Handley 57:01
That’s your spiritual dope. Right? You know, that’s your that’s like that’s your spiritual life Hi. Like, I know that like, a couple years ago, somebody’s been like, you know, dude, I just get half alive. I feel like you can go fuck yourself. But now like, you know, let’s let’s talk about that spiritual life Hi, right like living a life that is complete and being excited to keep waking up and I hate on asleep because I don’t want my day to end like I love I love you know, learning more about what it is like give right and what else can I you know, you know
Dave Gieselman 57:37
how all the
Brandon Handley 57:40
information I’m taking in I know is going to be in service for others, not just myself, but you know, there’s going to be someone that comes along tomorrow that needs the information that I just put my head yesterday.
Dave Gieselman 57:53
Right. Right. And, and, and showing up showing up powerfully so you know, yeah, I What I don’t know my purposes bullshit you know just like you talked about the DNA percent of his crap DNA and there’s there’s no reason it wouldn’t be there if it didn’t serve you take that thing that you love that thing that you’re obsessed with that thing that you know everything about the thing that you can’t let go by the way that’s your thing that’s like that that thing that you’ve been thinking about since since you were a child Yeah, that is your thing don’t
Brandon Handley 58:25
try mascot like I’ll tell you man that’s what you know i think you know so for those of you that are joining this first interview on spiritual Do you know I got done doing about a year series on you know, prosperity practice where I had this all this same feeling but like I was trying to mask it with something else right? Like I was like, let’s let’s see if we can mask it some way again, like it was like, Hey, you come in enjoy the prosperity practice. I want you to come check out this thing because what actually wants you to see is over here, right? Like, come check out this prosperity thing. But what I really want to do is, you know, connect you with all who you truly are. Right? Right. I think that that’s what you do, right? Like you help someone to see all of who they truly are. Because you been in touch with that for yourself.
Dave Gieselman 59:13
Right? You know and and to, to live at full volume right to not right not like stifle like any piece of me and not, you know to not drown out or mask or or you know or anything of any single piece of me to to live life exuberantly right and and and so you know you know we’ve talked about this we’ve had this conversation like like I’m not putting anything pretty in a box man like when i when i at the end of my row, dude, I want to go skidding in sideways. No rubber left on the tires.
Brandon Handley 59:54
Yeah, look, man, look, I want it all used up. I don’t want nothing left. You
Dave Gieselman 1:00:00
Yeah, I don’t want I don’t want any like, I don’t want I don’t want to leave. Like, I want to leave a thing on the table, right? I don’t want to I don’t want anything left. Like, I don’t want another mile left on that machine. Like, I’m not putting anything. And, and and that’s just that’s just the way it
Brandon Handley 1:00:20
is. But that’s truth. Right like I mean and I think that that’s true and and you know, talks about like the dog whistle thing but like when you hear somebody speaking their truth you know it like it is it is it is it is resonant. I hate resonance, but it is resonant. Right like it there is a true vibration in the room a true sensation that you receive when you are around someone who’s speaking their truth. Right. Right. And, and that to me, you know, that is life coursing through somebody else that is That is allowing that to happen, right like it is. It’s not forced. You can tell when somebody’s trying to force that shit.
Dave Gieselman 1:01:06
Right. Right. But yeah, it sounds funny. It sounds like they don’t believe it. It sounds like they’re saying it. But once again, the audio has to match visual audio
Brandon Handley 1:01:16
video has to listen and it will. That’s the thing. So with that, that’s a, you know, coaching, I think is awesome for that. podcasting, I think is awesome for that anything that you do that you begin to express who you believe you are in any way, shape or form. You don’t have a choice but to become who you keep calling.
Unknown Speaker 1:01:39
Right. Right. It’s great. Yeah, that was good.
Dave Gieselman 1:01:42
Look at that. Look at the people that you continue to attract into your life. Right, right. Yeah. By the way, that’s, that’s how you’re showing up just so you know. People you you call in your life that has a better stop.
Brandon Handley 1:01:55
No, it’s so true. It’s so true. It’s on level every time why Listen man always love you man what you know what is what’s like a parting blow man like you know what’s been your you know? I don’t know I have a segment yet that says like what’s been your like most spiritual hi do you chase a spiritual high do you does it tell them to you like yeah what’s your What is your spiritual Hi Dave
Dave Gieselman 1:02:21
you know what the
the spiritual part of this deal right is like the water part of the ocean right is like it’s the god part of of life is like the god part of it is like the water part of the ocean like it’s all God part it’s all spiritual part of it right like all of that there’s no part that isn’t there all or nothing
Brandon Handley 1:02:47
all or nothing
Dave Gieselman 1:02:48
You know, there’s no part that isn’t spiritual part even the stuff that that you don’t think is is a lesson in everything that you’re pushing with That’s nonsense. It’s full That’s not for me. That’s what that’s that’s lessons. That’s lessons and and it may be a lesson in setting boundaries and maybe a lesson and tolerance and maybe a lesson and empathy and maybe like, I don’t know what the lesson is, but I am absolutely certain that everything in my life is here for me. Okay, if nothing happens to me, everything happens for me for sure my and my job is to is to live is to live this life as as an expression of the universe just just through me.
Brandon Handley 1:03:34
Yes, Can I get an amen? Amen brother Can I get a what what awesome brother. Where should I send everybody to go find Dave easily?
Dave Gieselman 1:03:45
You know you get I am easiest to find Dave use on my personal profile on Facebook or become dash limitless comm www dot become dash limitless calm but I am most easily Found Dave giesemann go to my bush roaming profile you know, shoot me a private message. Dave you summon
you know and and and find me there everything I do. Eventually everything I do.
Facebook is kind of the portal for that so
Brandon Handley 1:04:23
I know awesome
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